Betwixt Insanity and Reason...

There's a bit of insanity in everyone. There have been moments of blinding range when I've felt like throwing things at the first person I saw. There have been moments of depression when I've felt like an island in this sea of humanity. I've also been known to ruminate on quite unnecessary things like conjuring up imaginary hurts/insults offered me (Oh, what if she thinks I am stupid? Oh, what if he thinks I am clumsy? Is that why he said that word at --------'s party?) and worrying about them.

I still consider myself sane (for the most part). I've recovered from these occasional fits of frustration, depression, loneliness, hallucinations to look back and laugh about it. And I am sure most people go through these phases once in a while.

The line between sanity and insanity is quite thin. I still don't know where that shadow exactly falls. I know a lot of utterly lonely, angry people, talking to oneself out of sheer frustration and imagining the world's against them. I've known quite a few characters who have grand hallucinations and think that the universe revolves around them. Most of these people are extremely intelligent.

But are they mad? Or are they just eccentric? Should I just report such characters to the authorities in the fear that they are potential candidates to turn completely mad? When do people go over the edge? Why is it that of two people who go through excruciating hardships, one turns into a seasoned, mellow person whilst the other becomes a psycho? I still don't know. I am still contemplating it as I read the aftermath of the Virginia tech murders.

P.S: I stole the beautiful picture from Arun's photoblog. He captured the essence of it when he titled it "The thin line between Good and Evil". Thanks, Arun!

Gandhi-giri : Munnabhai style

On a much-despised Monday morning, when one's rushing to work, muttering and cursing on self's lack of ability to wake up early, the last thing one wants to see on the outside panel of the door is a long, trailing, splotch of someone's saliva a.k.a spit.

I happened to witness this wonderful sight last week as I was locking my door. Aha! I was indignant. I wasn't going to have to clean up someone's spit ??! But when stuff happens on one's premises with none claiming responsibility, there's nothing much one can do except clean up the mess. Never mind that it is someone else's mess. That evening, I dutifully took a cleaner and scrubbed the offending sight from my door. I sprayed some disinfectant for added effect.

Next morning, I step out the door and there it is again: the same old splotch on a different spot on the door! I had my suspicion on the two wild things in my opposite apartment. So, what did I do? Did I go and knock boldly on their door and deliver a stinging slap for their unmannerly behavior? Unfortunately, no. I decided to do Gandhi-giri.

I dutifully took the cleaner and went to work again. The next day, I was relieved to see no spit on my door but when I inserted my key into the lock, it didn't go in. After several seconds of jiggling the key around, I finally locked the door. And now, the key refused to come out! I had to pull with all my strength until I tottered over backwards. Someone seemed to have tampered with the door lock. Sigh.

After putting up with more of this nonsense for a week, I figured I'd to do something. So I went to the apartment office this morning and lodged a complaint to fix the lock. The apartment guy urged me to go ahead and file a complaint against the suspects. But I've desisted for the time being.

Lest some of you might think that I am some enlightened soul, I did it out of sheer helplessness..:) There's no way that puny me is going to stand up to two strapping, drunken men. And if tomorrow, these guys decide to vomit on my door, its me that has to clean that up too!

It is at epiphanic moments like these that you realize why Gandhi chose "ahimsa". At times, there's just no other way! Oh and by the way, I am halfway through Gandhi's "My Experiments with Truth". Serendipity? Gandhiji, if you're watching this, I'd like some brownie points please!:)

What happened to Balaji Shankar?

A couple of years back, I stumbled across a CD of Carnatic musician Balaji Shankar. I haven't ever heard such a perfect voice in the carnatic world! I was absolutely bowled over by his renditions and searched for more. Alas, there only seem to be a couple of albums of his! :(

Each time I hear his clear voice intone "Chera Ravathey.." in Reethi Gowlai, I wish this talented singer would be heard again. What happened to him? Why did he stop singing? Does anyone know?
Well, if he ever does return to singing again, he can count on me as a devoted fan! :)

Honey, I am so nasty!

There are some personalities that I know, in the blog world and outside of it, that own up unabashedly to their personal faults. "Faults" is quite a subjective term and one man's poison is always another man's food. I think it shows character to own up to one's shortcomings and it is good. To a certain extent. But when "owning" up to it often turns into a grand flaunt of "Oh, I am so bad and I am going to shout from rooftops that I am an insufferable *****!" it does, err..become a bit annoying. Is there something as an overdose of character?!

What sharply bought it into focus was watching Kajol in "Coffee with Karan". Yes, yes, I am referring to that famous episode with Shahrukh, Kajol and Rani. The show was an eye-opener to the chauvinist in me in terms of how brainy some movie stars actually are. All three seemed quite witty and down-to-earth. And we had Kajol mentioning in every other line, "Oh, I don't like 99 of the 100 people I meet. I am hard to get along with. I am quite a wild person. blah blah blah.." The first time she said it, I thought it was cute. The second time, I appreciated her honesty. But the nth time she chirped that line parrot-like, it soured on me. Come on, Kajol, you're not such a big humbug after all and have you considered the possibility that none might give a darn about whether you're hard to get along with or not? And perhaps, that's not such a glorious attribute that you proclaim it on national TV?!

And 10-year-old kids gush, "Oh, Kajol is sooooo coooooooool na?!" And like kids picked up smoking in the 80s emulating then-heroes, today's kids are going to emulate being "nasty" or "rude".

Err..I think tomorrow, we are going to hear "cool" things like these from our kids:

"Oh, you know, I have a temper and I usually just bonk the first person I see with an iron poker."
"I am a chain-smoker and I smoke umpteen cigarettes a day. I don't care that my son sees me everyday and that he may follow my example. But I am uber-cool, na?"
"Oh, I am such a nasty person that I throw hot water on anyone else's face if they disagree with me."

See what I mean?:)

Wistfully me..

I caught up with a friend over phone after a really long time. It seemed to me like it was just now that we were in college. But it had indeed been a while! So we yapped around, condensing happenings of the past few months into a 40 minute conversation.

It made me wistful to think that I'd missed so many happenings in his life. It used to be that we once shared the most mundane, trivial things of our daily life. And yet, time constraints and other pressures make it impossible for me to do that now. After a day at work , gym, cooking, cleaning etc..it seems a gargantuan task to pick up the phone and talk to people on a daily basis.

Am I missing being a part of so many people's lives - friends and family? Does anyone (at least occassionally) notice my absence during important events? Does anyone want me in their lives? I wonder if some of my friends or relatives stop to think of me once in a while. I know I do. Or perhaps I am just another pebble in the riverbed and the river of life never stops flowing for anyone. It makes no difference to the river if one pebble is present or not. If all human bonds are so effervescent, why do we even try to be social? Perhaps its an evolutionary safeguard to maintain pack unity.

There are people who leave an indelible mark on society for at least the next few years or centuries. And then there are the commoners like me who'd not be missed or mourned. I don't aspire to be a celebrity. But I'd like to strive to be remembered amongst people I know.

Real life Jaws?

I have suddenly stumbled upon the world of podcasts. Although I knew about podcasts a long time back and listened to a couple, I never really explored it. iTunes has an amazing collection of free podcasts. While searching for some carnatic music links, I accidentally stumbled onto National Geographic's podcast collection in the iTunes store.

Search for "National Geographic" in the podcasts section of iTunes and look for a video titled "Octopus Vs. Shark". Man, is that an awesome footage or what! A Pacific Octopus, defending itself against a Shark, eliminates the Shark and drags the carcass along with it! I never thought Octopi could be this powerful. And all this happens in an aquarium! I am not sure how to post a link to an iTunes podcast. So please do use good old, manual searching in iTunes! :)

Terrific video and I had to gush about it. Err..I should get back to work now.

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Customer Service...

Symantec's AntiVirus customer service stinks. I recently bought Antivirus 2007 software from their website and tried to download it. It kept popping up a new window with a technical exception about database connectivity. Users should really not be seeing such raw exceptions. A good programmer would've handled it and popped up something meaningful on the UI. Sigh. I thought that perhaps this was temporary and tried after a couple of days. Same result.

Now, if you want to talk to a customer service representative about your inability to download their software from their website due to technical faults of their database admins/programmers, you have to pay them $39.99 per phone call. Note the fact that I am not trying to call them because I don't know how to install their software or use it. But even if its their problem, hey, its $39.99 per phone call.

So I turned to their Live Chat option. I interrupted my dinner for 20 minutes to talk to a rep. As fate would have it, I got someone from India.

Rep: Hello, Ma'am

Me: Hi, I've got a problem with downloading Antivirus.

Rep: [cleanly ignoring my response] My name is xxxxx and I am here to help you today. What can I do for you today?

Me: I have an issue with downloading Antivirus software. It pops up a window with the following exception. [Pasted exception]. Can you help me?

[Silence for 5 minutes]

Rep: So you're saying you have some issue with Antivirus?

Me: Correct.

Rep: So, what's the problem?

Me: [$%##%%#%..Blue blistering barnacles, I just told you, you numskull] I purchased Antivirus software from your site. I have trouble downloading it. I get an exception as follows...

[Silence again]

Rep: Did you buy the software?

Me: Of course! [Why do you think I am chatting with you?For your cerebral charm? I paid 40 bucks for that software!]

Rep: Can you give me your order number?

Me: Yes. xxxxxxxxx.

[Silence for a looooooooooong time]

Me: There?

Rep: Yes. You can download the Antivirus software for FREE in this link. [Gives link]

Me: For free? You mean I have to buy the subscription key, right?

Rep: No. Its completely free. Its a new offer.

Me: But what do I do with my existing purchase? I paid $39.99 for it!

[No response]

Me: I have puchased it already and I just need to download it.

[No response]

Rep: You can download it for free on this link I sent you.

Me: But that's for Vista. I am a XP user.

[No response]

I got so irritated with this guy that I just closed the chat session unceremoniously. Now, that's wonderful customer service for you. This has been my experience with lots of customer service representatives from India working for American Express cards, Dell, Symantec, Citicards etc... Perhaps, they're trained to read from a script and don't know what's happening. Or perhaps they are told to ignore customer responses. Who knows?

And I tried to download the software from the link the guy sent me. Whaddaya know? It asked me for a subscription key when I tried to install it..:) Grrrrrrr. And I still don't know why I have to pay Symantec to talk about a problem of theirs!

Perhaps, Symantec should pay me $ 1000 as damages for my interrupted dinner and the psychological trauma I suffered from chatting to their representative.

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Pick of the week

Prakash Raj's "...Solladhadhum Unmai" series in this week's Ananda Vikatan impressed me. I like the way he has handled "faith" and "belief".

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Picturabilia...

From left to right in each row as we go down:

1. Thirukkadayur Abhirami - Amirdhakadeswarar Temple tower

2. "Kamalalayam" - Tiruvarur temple tank

3. Tiruvarur Temple tank again

4. Madurai South tower

5. Mayavaram Mayuranathaswamy - Abhayambika temple tower

6. En route to Thirunallaru

7. Utharavahini Kaveri in Sivaramapuram, near Mayavaram

8. Beloved Kaveri again...

9. A peaceful twilight amongst coconut groves
10. Thiruvarur Temple tower
11 & 12. The dilapidated state of the ancient Utharakosamangai temple near Rameswaram.

Kala Ghoda, Handicrafts and Chozha bronzes

Mumbai is making it a tradition of celebrating the "Mumbai Festival" around January every year. Its a month long celebration of arts, food, culture, living and the Spirit of Mumbai. A lot of the events around this festival revolve around the Kala Ghoda arts district area of Mumbai. In my novel efforts to beat jet-lag, I figured making a few pit-stops at these events would keep me engaged in the afternoons.

I visited the Kutch Handicrafts Fair in Kala Ghoda. They were showcasing a whole bunch of hand-made, hand-painted crafts ranging from pillow cases, bags, patchwork quilts and bedsheets, dresses, paintings, decorations etc...The colors used were brilliantly and uniquely Indian and the workmanship was refreshingly all-human (as opposed to machine-made stuff is what I mean).

The Mumbai Food Festival, for all its hype, doesn't really deliver. I took a brief glance at the stalls but was turned off by the lack of anything innovative. Bhel puri, chaat, pizza, pasta etc..lined the stalls and sure enough, crowds were milling around each of them. Recovering as I was from flight food, my taste buds were just craving regular, delicious, home-made jeeraga rasam and I was able to safely skip the food fest with zero temptation..:)

The Pottery Mela in Colaba perhaps took the cake of them all. It really blew my mind to see what could be made out of plain clay - beautiful, sturdy wind chimes, hand-painted and glazed dolls depicting various scenes of village life, key hangers, wall decorations, Ganeshas in different poses and much, much more. I'd never realized that wind-chimes could be made out of clay. The villagers were indulging in direct selling themselves. And truly, its worth every rupee spent to encourage such cottage industries!

I fell in love with a village couple doll-set they'd showcased. The man, clad in a simple white dhoti, kurta and turban was enraptured in playing the dholak. The Rajasthani woman,sitting beside her husband, had her head downcast, the colorful pallu draped around her head modestly. Only the lower part of her face was visible. Her mouth curved upwards in a coy smile, she was playing a coconut violin (Kottangachi Vathiyam, in Tamil). The colors used in the dolls, the expressions on the faces and the beautiful workmanship still dance before my mind's eye as I write this. I desperately wanted to buy it but refrained just because I couldn't cart them to the US safely!

Hindu dharma says that a man/woman who allows the destruction of their country,culture or language in their own lifetime carries the burden of that sin through multiple lifetimes. Far be it from the Indian populace to destroy our own, wonderful rural cottage industries in the quest of all things foreign!

The Kala Ghoda Arts Festival is on from Feb 3- Feb 11. If one of you has a chance to visit Mumbai in this period, do check out this wonderful effort!

I wish Chennai had its own "Chennai Festival" where we could showcase the wealth of our region's culture! :)

P.S 1: In a case of misplaced enthusiasm (the "misplaced" qualifier arose later as you will discover in the following sentences), inspired by all I'd seen, I figured I should also look for arts from our own TN. I'd heard of famous Chozha Bronzes. So I marched into the Cottage Arts Emporium in Mumbai. I took a look at a particularly beautiful bronze of an elephant. It was about a foot high and definitely perfect as far as my untrained eyes could tell. Then I took a look at the price tag - Rs. 92,000! Gulp. Then, I realized that most of the bronzes came with a minimum price tag of Rs. 70,000. Another gulp. Thence ended my quest for Chozha bronzes (for now).

P.S 2: A week after this episode, I visited the Mayavaram temple. In front of the Abhyambikai Amman Sannidhi, there's a beautiful Chozha bronze of a "Paavai Vilakku". One has to see it to be amazed. I can't describe the beauty of it enough. So, I've given you a to-do next time you hit Mayavaram..:) The one on the left (Courtesy: http://www.globaladjustments.com/nlnov02.html) is just an example.

Tempus fugit, non autem memoria

Its been a good month since I put my fingers to type out a blog. Its not for the lack of topics though. I am bursting with things I want to write about. But since my muse is fickle and I have only so much time on my hands, this hasty blog is for starters.

I've been gone 20 days to India. I spent 10 days deep in the heart of Tamilnadu visiting ancient temples in the green, peaceful countryside of the Tanjore district. I've not felt so rejuvenated and relaxed in a long time! Visited my grandmother's village right by the Cauvery which she so fondly remembers even now. Met a lot of people whose lifestyles and priorities are so different from mine. Their lives revolve around fertile paddy fields, managing the harvests, milking the cows at home, tending to dogs, cats and birds that wander in from the lush coconut groves surrounding their house. They're educated and knowledgeable but they've chosen this rustic, laid-back, relaxed life. And more than me or my parents, they do look healthy, relaxed and happy!

Did we make a mistake by shunning this lifestyle and running to cities in search of money? Did we trade our peace and happiness by opting for hectic lifestyles? Or is this a case of grass on the other side always being greener? I am still introspecting...:)

Whatever it is, I know I belong in that land.

Oh, in case you're wondering what the title of the post means, its Latin for "Time flies, but not memory".

An empty post...

A few random observations -

- VFS' website - the website India goes to book its US visa appointments - doesn't work on Firefox. After entering a few details like name, date of birth etc.., I hit the "Submit" button. A "Date Format Exception" stared me in the face. I thought that perhaps the word verification had gone wrong. But alas, it took me a whole 1 hour to figure out that the website wasn't designed to work with Firefox. Duh. Some careless developer has broken the cardinal rule of them all: Always Handle Exceptions.

- I felt sorry for Saddam as I watched his final moments. Being taunted by other men before dying is not a pleasant sensation. And to make his humiliation public is even worse. No matter what his deeds were, he deserved a quiet, peaceful death...:(

-I think its time for me to stand up for a few, good movies. "Thiruvilayadal Arambam" (Dhanush, Shriya, Prakashraj) is not a great movie. Yet it is a super-duper hit. "Sivapathigaram" is a sensible, watchable movie. Yet it fails at the box-office. I really don't understand the taste of our junta anymore. I also liked Vettaiyadu Vilayadu and Jillunu or Kadhal. But they're failures at the B.O? What in the world is happening? Don't decent movies have a chance anymore in TN?

- Two recent cases shocked me to the core: the child murders of Noida and the Saligramam murder of a young boy by three other teenagers. Somehow, child murders in India have more shock value for me than hearing about those in the US. Talk about prejudice! How can men live with murdering children? Is their sexual appetite so insatiable that kids are not exempt? Why is it that men are so much more infinitely capable of cruelty than women? Or am I just being biased? From the rapes of Darfur to these murders in India, men seem to occupy centerstage when it comes to violating the dignity of human life..:( I am saddened.

- I have no New Year's resolutions! :) Yipppeeee!

- And I am going to be home for Pongal which makes me infinitely happy! :) Back to the festive colors, the rangolis, the sumptuous food and the comfort of parents....sigh! :)

A 1000 small pieces are equal to a picture....

A jigsaw keeps my restless mind fully occupied and there's fun in piecing a whole together from the parts. This jigsaw is more special to me because one of the cats in the picture looks like my pet kitten - Azhagi..:)

The jigsaw in pieces...



On completion...


Merry Christmas, everyone!

Taking stock...

The end of the year is approaching and everyone is taking stock. Have I grown in some way this year? Have I learnt some things? Have I changed a lot?

- I've learned to consciously walk away from certain relationships that hinder my peace of mind. Its not easy and often, I want to just forget and go back. But I've realized that its unhealthy and consciously stayed away.

- I've cut down on phone talking and consequently, become mentally more calm (Yaay! That's quite an achievement).

- I've given up afternoon coffee..:(

- Most importantly, I am learning to forgive - even when something's not my fault at all; even when the world knows that someone else is wrong; even when I am hurt; even when I'd rather kick and scream. I always thought that anger took more energy to manifest. I've realized that forgiveness is the toughest art to master in this universe and he who does this is truly divine.

- Gotten back to my Carnatic music roots and learnt some new krithis.

- I've become more conscious of the levels of human resource consumption thanks to a lot of conversations amongst friends here. Maybe I can contribute to the betterment of the world? Maybe I can't? But at least, now I am aware and that's always the first step.

- I've learnt that friends will stay friends no matter what you do or don't do. And those that leave because of something you did or didn't do were never friends in the first place. I know that sounds like a Hallmark card but I think this year is when I really realized that fact! :)

- I've learnt that few people remain "friends" because of some incentives. The moment that incentive vanishes, they'll walk away and not care a tuppence.

- I realised that being "good" (whatever that means), is purely principle-based. Being good doesn't guarantee a return favour. I had a bit of soul-searching in the middle of the year about this topic. I guess we still adhere to good behaviours for our own peace of mind.

Lastly, there are so many things to see, learn and do in this world! And there are so many colorful characters that make this world what it is - including heroes, villains, comedians, jesters, heroines, vamps, relatives, well-wishers, hangers-on, passers-by, friends and props! :) And in each story, each person takes on a different role. He who was a hero in one story becomes a comedian in another. When we have all these characters in a play in the right mix, we have an interesting story. Otherwise, it would become drab, wouldn't it? :)

A known devil...

I have a lot of blogger friends - people whom I know only through their writings and e-mail exchanges. I have never seen these people but I feel comfortable enough with their personalities as expressed through their blogs. But when it comes to Orkut virtual friendships, I become a tad cynical.

I keep getting friend requests from random people on Orkut asking me to be their best friend. They know nothing about me since I've not divulged much on my profile. I don't know anything about them aside from what they write on their profiles. So how do I "decide" to be best friends with them? Isn't that something that evolves over time? Besides, knowing what movies, books, food XYZ likes really doesn't make you understand them. A thousand people can have the exact same similar likes.

I did add a couple of strangers thinking that maybe I could overcome this "bias" of mine. I could rarely ever get past "hi, how are you?" with these people.And a couple decided to take it up a notch by asking obnoxious personal questions (Girls' "single" status especially seems to be of paramount importance to even strangers..:)). So I just chucked these right out of my friends list. How much can you really divulge to some stranger on chat? And it really becomes boring when, all the time, your conversations go something like,

"Hey, how're you?"
"I am fine. How are you?"
"Good"

Now, I know a lot of people who are very comfortable chatting up strangers on Orkut and even getting to know them well later. I guess I am not one of those.

I recently got an earful from an irate Orkut-ian. He had sent a rather nice intro message and friend request. So I thought I  should have the courtesy of responding to him. I asked him, "Do you really believe in virtual friendships? Is this really possible?" Honest to god, I meant it in a really good way just curious to find out what he was thinking when he asked me to be his "best friend". And he responded to it by detailing what a gentleman he is in his dealings with women, how he'd treat me honourably and never step over the line, how I was being callous in my comment etc etc...

Anyways, so I've switched back to doing what I always did before: ignore unknown friend requests...:) One of my friends complained rather loudly that I might be missing out on really wonderful people because of narrow vision. But I desist. Why? Because a known devil is better than an unknown angel...:)

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A question(able?) post

I am sick and tired of hearing about astrologers and horoscopes. Really sick. I don't blame those who practice the profession of astrology alone. I blame myself and millions like me who really can't take a stand on the issue. I can't stand up boldly and say, "Hey, I don't believe you can predict the future. You're a bogus". Neither can I surrender completely and say, "Hey, you are so right. I believe you completely".

It does seem odd to completely give in to a stranger's prediction of my "supposed" future and take decisions based on it. What if he's wrong? What if I make a decision based on it and then it fails completely? Would I blame myself then? Or the astrologer? Do we believe in astrology to feel re-assured about our future? Can someone really "see" the future so certainly? If he sees the future so certainly, isn't he supposed to be God? Well, what's the purpose of God or any actions that we perform in everyday life if everything's already pre-determined? Besides, if one's karma is so strong and we can't really escape it, why bother evading it using astrology?

In short, I've decided that "predicting" the future is a crime and astrologers as a profession should be banned. I think its better to just do what your heart tells you and consequences be damned. If that turns out to be wrong, hey, at least its your own, patented mistake - not some astrologer's. I meant for this post to be a more coherent, meaningful discussion on the truth/falsity of astrology. But I guess what turned it out to be is a confused set of questions...:) Maybe that's exactly what astrology is - a confused set of questionable practices.

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A gift of the gods..

The other day a friend and I were discussing playback singers. Some singers are great because they've honed and literally chiseled their voices over the years with hardwork and practice. Today, their voices are like honey maple syrup over pancakes (Yeah, I made that up. Its breakfast time and I can only think of food)! Example: SPB, Hariharan.

But some people are just born with killer voices. Voices that are just rich in cadence and timbre, that can just hit any high note with ease, that can simply twirl and swirl to the whims of the singer. Just listening to them, you know that this is something they were born with! You just can't achieve that kind of a voice through any amount of practice. Example: Shankar Mahadevan, A.R. Rahman, T.R. Mahalingam, K.B. Sundarambal

I was listening to Shankar Mahadevan sing "Rangola hola.." from Gajini. I simply loved the way he has sung this song. Similarly, I love "Kumari.." from Anniyan and "Merke Merke.." from Kanda Naal Mudhal. I've become a total Shankar Mahadevan convert..:)

A.R. Rahman has come a long way from his "Urvasi.." days. Listening to him in "New York Nagaram.." and "Tere Bina.." (Guru), his range just amazes me. I'd thought earlier that maybe he used some kind of audio pyrotechnics to help his voice sound like it did. But, when he performed live at Dayton in June, he effortlessly sang "Dil Se re..." at exactly the same range as the audio recording. I was blown away..!

I watched "Raja raja chozhan" (Cast: Sivaji, Lakshmi, Sivakumar, Muthuraman et al) last weekend and there's this song "Thanjai periya kovil vaazhga". T.R. Mahalingam simply made my jaw drop in one of the sequences of that song. That dude sure had a voice that could beat even Rahman today! He was probably singing somewhere at 4 kattai (sruthi) and he was doing vocal gymnastics at that scale! I know how much I struggle to sing at 6.5 which is considered ordinary for today's female playback singers. Made me envious..sigh.

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Soft corners

I ran into an old Asan Memorial school-mate of mine in Orkut. I had a crush on him while in school ( yeah, yeah, that was a really long time back when I was in 6th grade). It was actually a kind of collective crush. A lot of my friends traveled via the school bus. And he traveled via Pallavan. We used to lean out the window and giggle whenever we passed the busstop where we was waiting for his bus... :-) Our day was made if he turned around and gave us a smile. Thinking back, I think he must've thought - "Oh, what a bunch of cute kids!" - which is really not what we hoped for but then ignorance was bliss.

He was 6 years our senior. We never found out his name until after he graduated from school. We heard that he wasn't exactly, err - pleasant company. None of it mattered. We were just having giggly, girly fun!

The funny thing is I still have a soft corner for him. All these years past and I still giggled when I saw his profile pic in Orkut. He is still cute and I am not in love with him. But I wonder if we always carry around soft corners in our hearts for our past crushes, loves, flames etc... There's nothing like completely erasing these hidden shadows from the past! I find it really weird when I read about stories of intense love turning into intense hate or psycho-like behaviour. How can you ever dislike someone you once liked? Isn't it like disliking a part of yourself?

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Vallavan:

Hero's name is "Valluvan" the Vallavan. He becomes "Pallan" because he decides that being ugly, clumsy and annoying will impress Nayantara. Idhu enna logic?? Adhu Simbu-kku mattum dhaan puriyum nu ninaikkiren. He does do a good job of acting like "Kalyanaraman" Kamalhassan including dancing to the remixed number "Aaha Vandhurichu". But why this is essential to the main plot beats me! He spouts a few chauvinistic, pyscho dialogues from time to time and turns around and says:

"Ippadi ellam naan sollalaam..aana naan solla matten yennaa...blah blah.."

Mr. Simbu, ippo dhaane idhellam sonna? Apram enna solla matten-nu oru dialogue? He has some wonderful, logic-less scenes all over the place in the movie.

Reema Sen looks awful without make-up. But she has done an excellent job of acting like a pyscho. I, personally, liked her performance. Nayantara seriously stinks big time! Yuck.

Simbu, for all his self-generated hype, fails to give a hit. I saw one of his press releases where he praised this movie to the skies. Romba dhaan nenappu!

Music stinks. One question for the music director: Why in the world is there a kuttichathan, pisasu type laughter in the background each time Reema Sen is shown? Surely, this is no Vittalacharya movie. To add to the misery, Simbu croons a couple of numbers. He isn't a bad singer but then, his abilities are limited and it shows in the compositions. There's too many finger swishing, whoosh-whoosh sounds.

The cameraman seems to have gone haywire. My head started spinning after watching 30 mins of the movie. Lots of zooming, rotating,back and forth shots etc... Makes the viewer annoyed rather than entertained.

Jillunu oru Kadhal:

Contrary to reviews, I liked this movie. Jo-Surya chemistry sizzles on screen. The acting is natural and flows. A rather improbable plot but I thought it was decently picturized. Bhoomika's transformation from the first to second halves seems rather unreal and startling. The girl who acts as Jo's daughter does an excellent job! Of course, music pathi edhuvume solla vendam...it was superb!

I thought it was a decent watch.

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Overheard in the Restroom...

We, the people, need to talk. Talk, talk, talk. These days, we can't even resist responding to restroom vandalism. Although, I did it find it very amusing..:) Scribbled on a cubicle cube:

Some poor soul in need of help: This is a cry for help!
Some vetti person:                        Not a very good one at that, if you're scribbling in restrooms! :)

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