Sunday, September 24, 2006

Thursday, September 21, 2006

Maitreem Bhajatha...

I have a deep reverence for Mahaperiyaval Paramacharya Sri Chandrasekharendra Saraswathi. He had composed a song called "Maitreem Bhajatha.." which MS rendered in her golden voice. I've heard that MS always concluded her concerts with this song. It is a song for world peace and harmony. I found an excellent translation here.

Please do read it!

Monday, September 18, 2006

I don't know what to name this post....

People have an image of you in their head. I consider it more like a map. This image is probably a snapshot of "you" at some point in your life - 10, 20, 30, 34 etc... They make a map initially when they get to know you. And they relate to you based on that map. Initially, this is fine. That's the way I do it, you do it, everyone does it!

But people change in all aspects, in all dimensions all the time! You drift away from people - due to physical distances or some other pressures in life. After a while, when they come back into your life, the image that someone has of you in their head might not reflect the real "current" you accurately. I might have changed tremendously - in attitude, likes, behaviour, eccentricities etc...! If they update their mental map and say - "Hey, this is how they are right we update our map", that'd be awesome! This happens many times and you stay in a healthy relationship. But sometimes, people insist on sticking to their old, worn-out mental map and expect me to conform to it. It gets annoying after a while.

How do you tell them that? It seems rude to say, "Hey, wake up! I am not that person anymore!". Personally, its a bit scary for me because it is equivalent to negating the premise- the person I was some 6 years ago- on which we built a relationship. Sometimes I try to verbalize that I've changed but when they ask, "In what way?", I don't have a clear-cut answer. And what's sometimes even more annoying is that they'll brush away my words and say, "Bah! You're still the same...Don't give me crap!". Denial is the worst form of ignorance that blinds people and the hardest to deal with.

This is especially true with people we don't see often. They don't track your progress or transformation that closely to update their mental map of you. So they are stuck with an outdated map and you are not that person anymore. As for me, I've had a suffocating feeling where I am being forced to be the "old" me!

Monday, September 11, 2006

To the brats in my life....

Before you get double-meaning(ed) ideas from the title, let me clarify. This post is dedicated to the spoiled, ill-behaved people a.k.a brats I've met in my life. These people have contributed to ruining my mood a few times and I've had a few moments of hurt/pain because of them. But nonetheless, these people are important to me because they succeed in teaching me a few lessons of life that even my closest relations cannot teach me! :) If you're a brat, please don't read this post since it may contain certain unflattering remarks about you.

The first and biggest brat I've met so far in my life is one of my cousins. I refrain from mentioning her name in the unfortunate event that this person comes across my blog (and also to save the family izzat? :)). To her alone goes the dubious distinction of having the most acerbic tongue, the ability to unswervingly sting people in their weakest areas and attaining satisfaction from their pain.

During my college years, I met a replica of X. By then, I had become experienced enough in dodging such personalities. My association thus was extremely limited with Brat No. 2. Of course, after coming to the US, I've met quite a few more.

One thing I understood while dealing with brats is that its always about you. YOU made them angry. YOU insulted them. YOU annoyed them. YOU are the problem. YOU are dumb/untalented/boring. They are the most perfect, beautiful, smart, talented beings ever created by Brahma (or Christ or Allah).

I've seen parents/friends/relatives condone such behaviour dismissing it as "childish" or "immature" or "Oh he's my only pampered son!" or "You're elder..why don't you adjust?".

My argument:

How can being rude or hurting others ever be "childish"? Isn't a child supposed to be the embodiment of divinity? "Devilish" is more like brats than "childish"..:) How can a child even conceive of hurting others? And haven't these people ever heard of the quote:

ஐந்தில் விளையாதது ஐம்பதில் விளையாது. (What isn't sowed at 5 won't be sowed at 50 either).

The point is - if kids make a mistake, you correct it and teach them the right way. You don't justify it. To my parents or anyone 30 years elder to me, I will be a kid even now. So can I behave any way I want and hope to get away with it?

I guess we all have a brat in us. I have my own likes/dislikes/anger etc...But I know that disliking someone doesn't give me the right to hurt them in private or in public. And even if I did, I'd probably apologize.

Spitefulness is never justifiable. And brats, thank you for teaching me how NOT to live life! :)

That's my rant for now...